I feel like I’ve been struggling to get ~back on track~ diet wise since the new year started. It always sounds so easy to put it off until some future date. I’ll start after the new year. I’ll start next Monday. I messed up today, so I’ll just start after the Superbowl. Etcetera etcetera etcetera. That last one was me – I did “good” yesterday, so hopefully I can continue and not have a stout followed by a slice of pizza by Thursday night. Then there’s exercise. It’s nearly impossible to get to the gym right now, for purely motivational reasons. New York City is currently a land of ice and slush, and the mere thought of packing up my gym shit and lugging it through the subway, to work, then back to Brooklyn again, only to get off at a stop that I do not actually live at, to go to the gym for an hour, having to change and change again, packing everything up again and trudging back out into the maelstrom to get back on the subway and go home is my actual idea of hell on earth. For example, I just checked my gym’s class schedule and there is something called “kettle bell fusion” that I could potentially go to tonight. But that also sounds really hard and I just woke up and I’m still so tired. Honestly, if the big pharma scientists of the world don’t seriously step up their game and create a pill that will make me look like Jessica Biel, I’m just going to give up and start wearing moomoos and use a grabber to pick up my bag of chips and extra large soda from across my apartment because hey, I’m already married, why not? SIGH.
So, because dieting is hard, Kramer and I have found that when we do actually buckle down and stick to a plan, it’s usually of the ketogenic variety because it’s way easier than having to count calories or, really, think about it too much at all. Protein, good, carbs, bad. I can at least understand that. But when you’re on a diet like this, you do really miss bread, especially in the first week or two. Thankfully, there are tons of blogs dedicated to all things low-carb, even a subreddit, of course, which is how I found this recipe for almond flour buns. I tried these with coconut flour, too, but I do have to recommend the almond flour. There are flax seed buns that I also want to try, but from what I’ve read, these almond buns are the best option. They’re definitely not an English muffin, but hey, they’re still pretty good, and they do their job of soaking up melty cheese and runny eggs, which is all the bun is really there for if we’re being honest with ourselves. The only caveat to this recipe is that you really need a muffin top pan or a whoopie pie pan, which, being that this is 2015, you can buy on Amazon for under $15 with free shipping, so why not just get one? Anyway, armed with this extremely specific pan, you can make enough almond flour buns to stuff yourself to your heart’s content. You an even just slather one of these with a little butter to have on the side in place of toast, or throw a little peanut butter and sugar-free jelly on top if you’re feeling something a little sweeter that day. I promise it’s worth trying – anything to make dieting easier, right? Two buns weigh in at 4 net carbs with 10 grams of protein, so there’s no reason not to make them.
I was drawn to this recipe mostly because you only need a few ingredients.
Make your batter.
The batter will be a little drier than you’re used to, but don’t let that scare you. This round I did half coconut flour and half almond flour, but I highly recommend all almond flour.
Press the batter into your muffin top or whoopie pie pans (what a world) and bake until golden but not browned.
Place bacon, eggs, cheese and tomato in between two freshly baked buns and devour.
- ¾ cup almond flour
- 1½ teaspoons baking powder
- 2 eggs
- 5 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted (plus more for the pan)
- 2 slices cheddar cheese
- 4 slices bacon
- 2 eggs
- 2 slices of tomato
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F. Use half a tablespoon or so of butter to properly grease your muffin top or whoopie pie pan. Set aside.
- In a medium sized bowl, whisk together your almond flour and baking powder. Add in your eggs and whisk until combined, then add in your melted butter and whisk until combined. Press the batter into your prepared pan. Bake for 12-15 minutes, until golden and set. Use a butter knife to wiggle the buns out of your pan.
- If you want extra melted cheese on your sandwiches, I recommend placing a slice on the bottom bun of each sandwich, then placing them back in the oven for a few minutes so that the cheese melts. Top with two slices of bacon each, 1 fried egg each, and a slice of tomato. Close the sandwich and give it a little press with the palm of your hand to secure all of the ingredients. You'll have two leftover buns, which I'm sure you'll go back for seconds with. Enjoy!